Be The Love

As I was rolling into power soccer practice the other night, a young boy on a basketball team, probably middle school age, locked his eyes on me right when the sliding doors opened.  I tried to mind my own business and kept looking straight ahead, thinking he'd stop.  I grew irritated and annoyed as I knew he was still staring at me, I saw him out of the corner of my eye.  I thought to myself, "who raised you?  Don't you know it's not polite to stare?  Stop it."  I know everyone is curious as to how I drive my power wheelchair since I can't use my hands.  I also thought, "you're at a place for disabled children and adults, what do you except?"  I started to take the easy way out and convinced myself that, "he's just a kid and doesn't know."   

As I passed him, I gave him a fake smile, as if I wasn’t irritated at all.  He kept staring then hurried off.  I couldn't believe I did that.  No one saw it but God and I felt His presence right away.  He had seen the whole thing. He had witnessed my selfish fake smile and my rising blood pressure. My stomach barreled down and my heart sunk. It is tough to say sometimes, I'm not great at being nice.  I felt sad, fake, and mean.  I wanted to rewind so badly, to truly be kind because what if someone was watching and I just didn't see them.  You never know who's watching how you react, how you go on or just let it be.  

Each moment is a chance to not only love but love when someone's not loving.  To serve, to love, to take the high road and go the extra step.  To look directly at someone and flash a real smile so big that they might see something stuck in your teeth.  Or nod and wave as if it's being unseen and unappreciated.  Extend grace, trust God, love openly. 

Psalm 86:15 But you, O Lord, are a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness.

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